Men's Formula of Respect for Women

R.E.S.P.E.C.T. I think that most women don't understand how men go about constructing the idea of respect towards women upon the first impression. Men are visual creatures, first and foremost. Often times what we see, or what is presented to us visually, will affect our judgment. (Yes, we judge, just like everyone else. Get over it.) Our judgment will in turn affect our perception of you. As a result, we tend to formulate our respect for women based on that perception. Let's try and think of it as a point system. Some reasons that may impact your "respect points" are:

Your Attire & Appearance

One is a "Working Girl" and one is a girl at a club.
Can you tell?... No? Join the club.

If a woman dresses like a "Lady of the night", she might be mistaken as one. Women have GREAT insight. They can spot another "loose woman" from mile away. So why act surprised when you dress just like them, and men view you similarly? As a man, if I don't want to be mistaken as a thug, I'm not going to wear baggy clothes and sag my pants. So if all the "fast" women in the world started wearing polka dots, and you start wearing polka dots, you don't think that you'll be viewed  similarly? That being said, the problem doesn't really lie in the clothes you wear. The problem lies with the small amount of harlots out there that wear those clothes and mess it up for the majority. Of course it's not right to be clumped together with those types of women, but it sure does make things confusing for men. If you still don't get it, refer to a wiser man than myself:

Your Actions & Behavior

Ever wonder why "actions speak louder than words"? It's because actions can been seen, even figuratively. If we simply say "Hello" and you automatically respond with a stink face (we think snobby), middle finger (we think bitchy), or rolling your eyes (we think conceited), you will lose respect points. Also, if you're the touchy-feely type...STOP IT! You're sending mixed signals if you're not interested in us romantically but yet you keep touching us. We take that as an open invitation even if you didn't intend it to be.

What can you do then if you're not interested if a guy approaches you?
-Keep your responses very short
-Say thank you
-Give LIMITED, to no eye contact
-Start to talk on your phone

If you ever feel as if you're not in safe situation, ignore him and walk away. Many men can be overly aggressive and ignorant with their approaches to women, but there is absolutely no reason as to why you should feed into it with even more ignorance. You may feel as though flipping him the bird, or throwing out some choice french words are appropriate, but that may only make your situation worse.

I think that everyone is entitled to basic respect, especially women (ie: You don't lay hands on them, you don't call them outside of their name, you don't speak down to them, etc) But, some women feel as if they are entitled to get respect just because they are a woman. Whether you are a man or woman, initial respect is something earned, not entitled. I think that people should respect individuals based on that individual's character and actions. As for a man's formula for respect: Your Visuals+ Your Actions + Your Behavior + Our Judgment + Perception = How much we respect you.

Check out the follow up blog where I talk to the men called "The Importance of Respecting Women for Men".